Could your wife have an affair because you are too fat?

Hi, Hans Ratzenburger here with another one of my posts on diet and weight loss.

Gentlemen!  How would you like it if your wife had twins and you found out that they had different fathers?    This would come as quite a shock to most men.

Now, I know that most of my readers are not the “Brain of Britain” but even a half-wit with the IQ of a pot plant would smell a rat when they got this news and would suspect that their wife had been “playing away from home” with other men.


Same mum, different dads?

This has actually happened as an article in todays papers reports.

A VIETNAMESE woman has given birth to a rare set of bi-paternal twins — twins with different fathers — according to a Vietnamese scientist and the nation’s state media.

Prof. Le Dinh Luong, president of the Genetic Association of Vietnam, says DNA testing at his Hanoi lab confirmed the twins have different fathers, the first such case that he knows of in Vietnam, with only seven such cases reported in the world as of 2011.

Luong declined to give details because of confidentiality with his client.

Online newspaper Dan Tri reported that a 34-year-old man from northern Hoa Binh province had DNA testing after being pressured by his family because the twins did not look alike.

One has thick wavy hair while the other has thin and straight hair.

As soon as you found this out your first thoughts would be why?   You seem to be a happy couple, deeply in love.    You are a good provider and a great dad.

Why would your lovely wife have decided to have sex with another man?

I expect that you would probably break down in tears and head towards the bathroom looking for a box of tissues or a large bottle of sleeping pills.  But once there you would look in the mirror and through the mist of tears you would see an ugly fat bastard looking back at you.    Finally the penny drops!

In the real world, a woman will only put up with making love to a fat partner for so long before her eyes (and other parts of her anatomy) wander in the direction of another fitter and more physically attractive man.

Don’t get me wrong.   Women think of themselves and their own personal economic situation first so your wife will most probably stay with you for the foreseeable future and provide you with the occasional charity sex to keep you quiet, but her loins would yearning for the attentions of a fit and virile stud who knows what she wants and has the equipment and hands-on expertise to give it to her.


Some women prefer to make love with a virile, fit stud

So let this be a wake-up call for you fat men out there trying hard to lose weight like I am.   If you have taken your eye off the ball and gradually turned into a fat, ugly bastard you need to put everything else on hold and make losing weight your number one priority.

There are many reasons to lose weight.    Self image, health, able to wear nice clothes, but never overlook one of the most important reasons to lose weight.

The Number One reason to lose weight is to maintain your attractiveness to your intimate partner (if you are lucky enough to even have one of those).   Nothing else comes close in the hierarchy of reasons to lose weight.

So gentlemen, if you want to increase the odds of all of your children actually being your own kids, then start on the Ratchet Diet today and Lose that Lard!

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